Gringa seeks roommates in her cozy two bedroom hut to aid in further integration into jungle lifestyle.
Recent responses to the alleged ad have included, scorpions, tarantulas, this horrendous arachnid known as a tailless whip scorpion which is neither scorpion nor spider, toads, mice, iguanas, ants, mosquitoes and the neighbors dog (he came running into my house a few nights ago dragging not just the chain they use to tie him up with but the entire tree branch he was tied to). And just like roommates they eat my food, keep me up late at night and steal my stuff. The dog ran off with one of my shower sandals earlier today, I took off after him but the little mutt is fast.
Generally my roommates are annoying but I deal. Its easier to gently relocate the tarantulas outside then clean up the hairy squished mess and I even caught one of the scorpions (hes living in an empty peanut butter jar). The tailless whip scorpion has escaped my attempts at smashing him with a boot so many times that I’ve decided to adopt the motto “walk softly and carry a big stick”. If my life were a reality show it would be called Survivor: Guatemalan Jungles, life in a giant terrarium…lets just say I'm glad I sleep underneath a mosquito net.
Would you want this living in your shower?
Tailless whip scorpion