Tortillas

Tortillas are a way of life here in Guatemala. The exact diameter and thickness vary across the country, tortillas in more urban areas tend to be smaller and more delicate whereas the tortillas in the more mountainous regions are thicker and tougher. Tortillas vary in color depending on the type of corn used, most are white however there are also yellow and black tortillas. The taste is considerably better than any corn tortillas I have found in California. Every meal is served with a small basket of tortillas and much like French bread at an Italian restaurant in the states there are unlimited refills. Unlike in the states though, the consumption of large amounts of this carbohydrate is not frowned upon. No one will judge you for “filling up on tortillas” before your meal is served. No Atkins diet here, these men mean business. Acceptable ways of getting more tortillas at dinner include franticly waving your empty basket in the air, yelling across the room or making a rapid series of clicking noises at any passing female.

I enjoy eating tortillas. I’ve yet to get sick of them and even find myself waking with cravings for the toasty goodness. I usually only eat them once a day, and I usually eat about three of them. By Guatemalan standards I am underconsumming tortillas and therefore suffering from some sort of dietary disorder. At one of my schools the other day lunch was being served and while I was served more than enough eggs and beans, I found myself with no way to eat them, forks are rarely used out in the villages. A kindergartener quickly identified my problem: lack of tortillas. She presented me with one from the stack her mother sent her to class with. More students became concerned with my lack of tortillas and began piling tortillas on my plate. In Guatemalan society it is extremely rude to refuse any food people give you so I sat there and ate every single tortilla that was given to me. The generosity of those fifteen children will not be forgotten.

Although it’s perfectly acceptable for a woman to eat lots of tortillas it is practically a requirement for a man. I was hanging out with my site mate Chris at my house when my landlord Anibal came up to us and started chatting. Chris is a relatively tall guy; he was raised in Texas and played college football. You might call him a good old corn fed American boy. Anibal is a typical Guatemalan man, he stands about 5ft tall, with his boots on. Anibal naturally asked Chris how many tortillas he eats at dinner, the true test of character here. The conversation went something like this, translated from Q’qechi into English for y’all.

Anibal: Cristobal how many tortillas do you eat?

Chris: A lot.

Anibal: Rebecca doesn’t eat enough tortillas, maybe one or two.

Me: I usually eat three or four.

Anibal and Chris: Thats not enough.

Anibal: I eat a lot too, you want to see my kitchen I’ve got a bunch in there.

Chris: I eat ten. I’ve got a woman who brings them over to my house for me at dinnertime.

Anibal smiles in approval.